Loss is inevitable, and it’s an essential part of being human.
What can often end up happening though, is we experience our grief as a sign of weakness.
We try to put on a brave face and jump straight back into work as if nothing ever happened. But the truth is, pushing our grief down doesn’t make it disappear.
That’s a reality today’s guest knows intimately.
Rebecca Feinglos is a certified grief support specialist, the founder and CEO of Grieve Leave, and the host of the Grief’d Up podcast.
After losing her mother to brain cancer as a teenager, Rebecca became a master at hiding her pain. It was almost a badge of honor to seem perfectly fine.
But when her father suddenly passed away in early 2020, and she navigated a divorce shortly after, the illusion that you can compartmentalize your grief was completely shattered.
Rebecca took a dedicated ‘year of grieve leave’ and today, she reaches millions, offering honesty, humor and real tools to help people navigate their darkest moments.
Whether you are grieving the death of a loved one, the end of a marriage, or any major life transition, you’re going to discover how to hold space for your feelings without losing your momentum, how to truly support the people around you, and how experiencing your lowest lows can ultimately lead to your deepest joy.
“You can act like it’s not there for a while, but when you don’t give your feelings space, they don’t just magically disappear.” — Rebecca Feinglos
In This Episode, You Will Learn
- Why pretending your grief isn’t happening is the biggest mistake you can make.
- How to utilize the wave model and the pendulum model to better navigate loss.
- The truth about the five stages of grief and why it was never intended to be a linear model for everyone.
- How to properly show up for a colleague or friend who is navigating a difficult season.
- Why practicing being alone can drastically shift your identity and build your self confidence.
- Plus much more…
What We Discuss:
- 00:00 – Episode Opener and Introduction to the Podcast
- 01:14 – Podcast and Guest Intro
- 02:59 – The Biggest Grief Mistake
- 05:50 – High Achievers And Duality
- 07:20 – Childhood Coping And Compartmentalizing
- 13:58 – Father Passes Away During Covid
- 21:20 – Grief Changes Over Time
- 23:49 – Freedom After Rock Bottom
- 28:18 – Finding Safe Relationships
- 34:15 – Learning You Are Safe
- 39:10 – Practicing Being Alone
- 41:42 – Self Talk On Solo Dates
- 44:25 – Reference Points Story Setup
- 44:47 – Grasshopper Meets Ants
- 45:18 – Reference Points Framework
- 46:11 – Past Present Future Self Talk
- 49:14 – Grief Anniversary Waves
- 53:02 – Making Space At Work
- 54:56 – Workplace Culture And Retention
- 58:40 – Be A Workplace Villager
- 1:02:15 – Authentic Support Scripts
- 1:06:20 – Beyond Death Grief
- 1:10:46 – Disenfranchised Grief Explained
- 1:15:04 – Better Grief Models
- 1:19:10 – Rapid Fire Your Edge
- 1:21:42 – Basketball As Connection
- 1:24:05 – Where to Connect and Closing
About Rebecca
Rebecca Feinglos is a certified grief support specialist, founder of Grieve Leave, and host of the Grief’d Up podcast. After losing her mother as a teen, her father in 2020, and navigating a divorce, she took a grief sabbatical, and Grieve Leave was born. The platform now reaches millions, offering real tools, humor, and honest conversation to help people take intentional time to grieve. Rebecca previously worked as a policy advisor in state and local government, and began her career as a bilingual educator. She holds degrees from Duke University and the University of Chicago, and her voice has been featured in TIME, LA Times, ELLE, and more. She splits her time between North Carolina and Montreal with her dogs, Daisy Duke and Ralphie.
Show Notes
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